Well I am officially in my last week here at the CCM. I'm feeling a mix of emotions right now. I'm so excited to get out into the field and teach but at the same time I'm sad to be leaving all of the friends I've made here. I hope that we will be able to stay in touch throughout and even after our missions.
This week has been really good though. Each day I can see the improvement I'm making in the language and in learning the Gospel. It's amazing how the CCM can make you realize you don't know as much as you thought you did. That's okay though because I am here to learn and grow!
Learning and growing is something I have been thinking a lot about here in the CCM, especially during this last week. I have been thinking a lot about the Lord's plan for me and what He wants me to learn and become here in the CCM, on my mission, and really during my entire life. Our leaders have talked a lot about how we can either pass through our mission and finish no better off than before we left, or we can allow our missions to pass through us and become someone we never imagined we could become. I definitely want to let my mission pass through me.
I am so grateful I have been given the opportunity to serve a mission, and that serving was Heavenly Fathers plan for me. Because of that and the words of my leaders, I have been thinking about how sad it would be if I went out on this mission just went through the motions and the returned home not accomplishing what it was I was sent out here to do and become. I've also thought about how this applies to each one of us in our own lives and how sometimes we get caught up in life and just go through the motions while letting life just pass us by. I definitely know there are times when I have been guilty of doing this. Instead we should be looking at each day as an opportunity to learn and grow and move towards our full potential. I often think about how that when I approach the end of my life and look back on all that I've done I want to be able to say that 1. I've made a real difference in the world 2. That I've accomplished all that I was supposed to in this life 3. That I've become the person Heavenly Father intended me to be. I also want to be able to say all of those things when I reach the end of my mission. I know that someday I am going to have to give an account to the Lord about my mission, life, and my works during both and I want to be able to stand confidently before Him and not have my mind filled with regrets and could haves, and should have done's about my life. Thinking about this has really enhanced my desire to be diligent and work hard and strive to have the spirit with me so that I can be guided and directed as to what I should be doing, learning, and changing in my life. I know that as I do these things the Lord will be with me and that I will be able to be the servant the Lord wants me to be. I hope that at the end of my mission my friends and family will ask me about my mission and if I reached my goal of being the missionary that God intended me to be and that I can answer with a solid "Yes!" and then tell them why. I also hope that each one of you will take a look at your own lives and see if the Lord is pleased with where you are at and where you are going. I know that if we approach the lord with a humble heart and the desire to do His will he will be able to make our lives into something more than we ever thought possible. We will be able to change ourselves, our families, and affect the lives of many people for good. Then after our lives are over and we stand before the Lord and he asks us what we did with our lives here on earth we will be able to say with confidence "Lord, I did all that you sent me to the earth to do," and what a wonderful day that will be!
Anyway, I love you all so much! I hope you have a wonderful week!
P.S. I got a wonderful compliment today as I was playing basketball with some of the Elders from my district and zone (Literally it was me, my companion watching, and 7 elders...) Anyway, we were playing 21 and I had the ball and shot it and one of them rebounded and shot (which zeroed all of my points) and one of the Elders in my district said "Come on, really, she's a girl that's not very nice" to which the other Elder responded "It doesn't matter if she's a girl or not, what matter is that she's good, and she obviously knows how to play basketball." Ha! That is honestly what I strive for whenever I am playing sports with guys. Even though I am a girl and am obviously at a disadvantage because of it I like to think I can at least old my own, and obviously I can. Anyway even though I don't think he meant it as a compliment it was to me!